In the case of mediation, an independent third party will monitor the communication and the negotiations between the parties concerned. An attempt will be made – taking both parties’ interests into account – to arrive at an arrangement that is the best possible arrangement for each party and is supported by both. Both parties are encouraged to realise the (real) interests behind their viewpoints and communicate and negotiate with each other in a structured way.
All issues that have to be arranged will be discussed under the supervision of the mediator. The mediator is impartial , or rather, partial to both sides and will always keep a sharp focus on the interests of the children and the effect the arrangements between their parents will have on them.
Mediation takes place on a phased basis. One after the other, the relationship phase, the practical phase and the legal phase will come up for discussion.
Communications and as many aspects of the conflict as possible will be recorded. All interests will be listed, followed by structured negotiations. During the last phase, the results that have been achieved and the arrangements that have been made, will be translated, legally speaking, into “the shadow of the law” and will be set out in an agreement.
The costs of a mediator will be shared, which means mediation is cheaper than adversarial proceedings. The solutions that are achieved, are better complied with and communication in the “after-marriage” is better, which has a positive effect on the children.
We are all experienced mediators and members of the Dutch association for family lawyers and divorce mediators (vFAS) and our mediations success rate is high.